Sorry I haven’t posted in a while! I hope this makes up for the gap. I wrote this piece of flash fiction as a friend’s birthday present. It’s actually the first piece of flash fiction–as opposed to drabbles, which are the fan fiction equivalent–I have written in years, that I am entirely happy with.
Personally I prefer the word ‘drabble’, but anyway … on with the piece.
The detective steepled his fingers, doing his Holmes impression whilst the suspects all filed into the room.
Colonel Mustard came first; stiff military stature, an air of cold indifference. Mrs Peacock followed shortly behind, fanning herself to try and disguise her shaking hands. Reverend Green was the first to appear calm; confident in his own innocence. Miss Scarlet slunk in alongside Mrs White, despite the intense dislike shared between them; and bringing up the rear was Professor Plum, nervously mopping his brow.
All with motive, all with opportunity. Yet, the detective had explored every option, and as they lined up nervously, waiting for him to pronounce which of them were for the noose, his eyes flickered to the guilty party, and he smiled.
“So?” The Reverend spoke first. “Which of us did it?”
“I expect you did,” said Miss Scarlet. “I saw you going into the library with the candlestick!”
“No! I thought it was Mustard with the pipe—”
“How dare you!” the Colonel blustered. “It was obviously Mrs White—”
They began squabbling amongst themselves.
“You’re all wrong,” the detective said loudly. They fell silent, miraculously.
“Well then, who was it?” the Professor asked after a moment’s pause.
The detective pointed, and they all craned their necks to see who he was indicating.
“It was,” the detective said amongst murmurs of disbelief, “the cat.”
This entry was posted in Flash Fiction, Writing Examples and tagged author, cluedo, creative writing, crime fiction, detective, fiction, flash fiction, literature, murder mystery, parody, prose, reader, reading, whodunit.
I guess blogging, like with anything, there’s a time to know when to break the rules. Today, I am rambling just like I used to.
For starters, sorry again for the gap. Birthday + nasty cough = letting things slide. Not that the cough and the birthday were at the same time, thank goodness. I had one, then the other. And talking of my birthday, see photo below!
The Doctor Who decorations and cake kit were a bit of a surprise from my mother. It certainly added a little something to my party, which consisted of four friends and two brothers coming over and all of us stuffing ourselves with pizza then talking geeky stuff until … uh, quite late. Late in my book, anyway. I’m no night owl.
The cough hasn’t been nice. Usually I can stave off colds with what I call my “magic tea”–it’s not magic, just a Chinese herbal tea called Xiasangju Keli. I just have a cup or two when I start getting the sniffles and it clears up–much better than First Defence, which I’ve never liked. I’ve never got a full-on cold since I began drinking it (the time I forgot to drink it aside), though sore throats seem to be something else. Either that or I just didn’t drink enough. Anyway, I’m just coming out of my lack-of-sleep haze enough to be able to write something coherent and hopefully interesting. I’ve spent most of the last few days watching House of Anubis (series two, second time!) and reading Percy Jackson–finished the first series for the second time, and just finished the first in the second, for the first. The two combined have given me some strange dreams and story ideas. I’m itching to write something with weird puzzles and time travel.
Today, for only the second time ever, I did an entry at 750words.com. It would be a very useful site if I remembered to use it more often. I wish I had the gumption to do it every day, but when I look at the little link in my toolbar I think, I dunno what I would write/I feel dry/my brain’s not up to the task, etc. But I managed to get my fingers moving on the keyboard again and spurt out a load of random stuff, some of which I have just re-written for this paragraph! I’m hoping using it will get me back into blogging, and give me more randomness to offer the world.
I’m changing the subject back to the cupcakes, but only because I didn’t want to put this earlier for formatting purposes:
Nothing says “I love you in all your geekiness” like #Dalek cupcakes from Mum on my birthday.
— Alex Harlequin (@aharlequin) January 26, 2014
My copy of You is For University, in which “Nutshell” is published, is in the post! Finally I can see my name in print for the first time. And in my final bit of news, I received an offer for someone to translate some of my Doctor Who fanfiction into Russian! I actually got the request a while ago but I’ve just said yes (I thought I had already for ages). I’ve already had a Harry Potter drabble posted in French … does this make my work trilingual? Okay, probably not, since I’m not doing the translating. But still!
This entry was posted in Fan Fiction, Food, Geekiness, Misc Rambles, Writing News and tagged alex harlequin, alexannah, anthology, aquila, author, blogging, creative writing competition, dalek, dalek cupcakes, doctor who, fan fic, fan writing, fanfic, fanfiction, fantasy, fantasy short stories, fiction, food, foodie, freewriting, geek, genre, house of anubis, neo writers, nerd, percy jackson, poem, poet, poetry, poetry anthology, prose, rick riordan, science fiction, short story, sleepless night, social, the student wordsmith, time travel, young adult.
I’m currently agonising over the last question for my yearbook profile. “What experience at uni will you always remember?” Well to be honest, most of my good experiences over the last three and a bit years have nothing to do directly with my uni. Most of the friends I’ve made during that time are through outside things–NaNoWriMo and church. The friends I made in Fresher’s Week I had a great time with then, but lost somewhere down the line. Because I’ve never done much social stuff at uni, I was out of mind.
Okay, I’m going to stop this here before it turns into a poor-little-me routine. That’s not the intention. I’m just expressing my dilemma. I will probably end up saying something about Fresher’s Week, but I wish I knew what to write.
Anyway, moving on, I spent an interesting Monday morning plotting one of my villains for Aquila. It’s the second time I’ve used my giant whiteboard, which is a great tool as long as I write it all down somewhere permanent and wipe it off fairly quickly. I took a photo this time, although I’ve had to black a few points out to avoid spoiling too badly. OK, half the points.
Here’s a little taster:
I’m getting there with the first draft. I reached the end of my plan with 2,000 words to go, but since plotting my villain(?s) out I’m making progress with filling the gaps. It still reads a bit stilted to me, but maybe I’m being a bit hard on myself. I need to print out the whole thing and scribble on it. That always helps. I might even post an extract.
One last thing. I’m considering submitting the Aquila original short story in a competition to be published in a YA anthology. Maybe one of my other stories as well (it accepts multiple submissions). Watch this space! Unfortunately one of my poems, Reasons to Sing, might not now be published due to the anthology not receiving adequate funding. This is the donation link.
This entry was posted in Misc Rambles, Uncategorized, Writing Examples, Writing News, Writing Process and tagged alex harlequin, anthology, aquila, author, brainfog, cfs, character development, charity, christian, christian poetry, christian writer, chronic fatigue syndrome, church, coursework, creative collection, creative writing, creative writing competition, fiction, fiona major, genre, gospel according to poetry, literature, myalgic encephalopathy, nanowrimo, neo writers, poem, poet, poetry, poetry anthology, poetry competitions, prose, publication, published poet, published poetry, reading, reasons to sing, science fiction, script, script frenzy, short story, social, student, superhero, wordsmith, writing, writing insight, writing student, young adult, young writer.
Review of “The Christie Curse” by Victoria Abbott
As for the plot, “The Christie Curse” is a mystery about a supposedly lost Agatha Christie play, which is linked to a possible murder. The protagonist, Jordan Bingham, is relatable enough despite most readers probably weren’t raised by crooks as she was. Her job, to track down the play for her book-collecting, dragon of an employer, quickly looks to be dangerous but she continues stubbornly at it—if only to keep her luscious room and meals at the Van Alst manor house. She is a little too quick to point the finger but that only makes her more human.
The mystery itself is intriguing. Whilst I guessed about the cat quite early on, I only realised whodunit a few sentences before it was actually stated—about the right time, in my view, for the reader to work it out. A few scenes ran tingles up my spine, but there was nothing at all thriller-rish about the book—overall it’s what I think is called a ‘cosy’ mystery. There was definitely a Christie element, though you don’t have to be particularly familiar with her works to read the story.
I enjoyed every moment of the book, and highly recommend it. The best thing is, it’s the first in a series, and I believe the second one is out now.
Insane Facebook Conversation
My friend gave me permission to post this here. I had to save it for posterity. Possibly the most bonkers conversation I ever had, except maybe with the lady in New York who could tell I was English just from my complexion (apparently).
Me: I think my computer’s got Chizpurfles.
Friend: Oh dear … This is what happens when you exterminate all the Doxies in your home. Doxies feed primarily on dead skin cells and Chizpurfles.
Me: Hmm. I guess I shouldn’t have bought all that Doxycide from amazon.wiz—what a waste of Galleons. I should have trained them to guard my electrical items instead. Especially my TARDIS, it’s been crashing for weeks. Mr Scamander should have informed me. That book of his has some serious gaps.
Friend: Scamander? The Scamander prejudice against Doxies is well known. I’m surprised you hadn’t heard. They all despise Doxies and have advocated the complete extermination of the entire species. There was an article about it in the Prophet the other day, I’ll send it to you by owl when I find it. As for your TARDIS, I find when mine is malfunctioning, a good kick to the console tends to fix it for a while. Alternatively, I’ve heard that some people have luck with blue or green jello.
Me: Scamander? Prejudices? Well I never. Thank you very much for the article. I’m a Quibbler reader myself, hence why I didn’t see it. I would kick my TARDIS, but it was rather delicate before those pests got at it. I could try the jelly, if I had some. My first instinct was a powerful Reparo, but I’m afraid of the whole magic vs electronics clash.
Friend: Just once, I tried an enlargement charm on a computer screen, I was trying to turn it into a TV you see, and nothing happened except that all the actors, characters and animals on the screen seemed to have red eyes. It was a bit unsettling after a while. Since then, I prefer not to mix the two, just in case. I wouldn’t try it on something the size of a TARDIS. I suppose you could hire a Jedi mechanic … I mean, the Force is, after all, as much magic as science … but it could be expensive.
Me: Bro, help, I need Star Wars knowledge for a comeback.
Bro: May the unhelpful quote be with you.
Friend: Victory is mine
Me: [struggles to think of something witty to say about the currency in Star Wars—what IS the currency in Star Wars???] You are no longer my brother.
Bro: [grins inanely—at least, that’s what I reckon he did though I wasn’t actually there]
 Chizpurfle: a pest (from Harry Potter, but mentioned only in Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them) which feeds on magic or, in the absence of such, “has been known to attack electrical objects … explaining the puzzling failure of many relatively new Muggle artifacts” (Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find them, page 7 footnote.)
 My phone, which has a TARDIS skin.
Pin of the week
If anyone can help me properly embed a Pin so it SHOWS UP properly, please get in touch! At the moment I’m having to save the pics and upload them. The guidance on Pinterest is not working.
This entry was posted in Book Reviews, Games, Geekiness, Misc Rambles, Reviews and tagged agatha christie, art, author, book review, books, chizpurfles, Christie Curse, christmas, cosy mystery, detective, doctor who, drama, fantastic beasts and where to find them, fiction, geek, genre, harry potter, history, Jordan Bingham, literature, media, nerd, novel, novel series, pinterest, play, prose, reader, reading, review, Scamander, series, tardis, troubleshooting, visual arts, whodunit.
Apologies for the long gap in posting. Hope everyone had a good Christmas and didn’t get indigestion. I hope all those in my area have their power back on now, and didn’t get flooded–weather’s been awful.
A Who-ish Season
I got a book called Doctor Who: The History of the Universe in 100 Objects for Christmas (along with two Doctor Who calendars–my parents know me!). I’ve only flicked through it so far, but I have mixed feelings about these kinds of books. As far as I can predict without reading it cover to cover, anything related to the new show I’ll already know, and anything to do with the classic series will probably spoil me majorly for when I watch the episodes in question. Which I plan to once I own the complete box set that was being advertised at the Anniversary Celebrations at London ExCel (no price or release date I noticed, but it’s obviously being planned, and about time too).
I don’t think I wrote anything about the Anniversary Celebrations for my blog, which I will rectify probably in the next post. For the moment, my two cents on the last two episodes. I went to the cinema to see the Anniversary episode, and enjoyed it more than I thought I would actually. Ten(nant) was my Doctor and I never quite got into the new style of writing either since the show changed hands (that’s not to say Moffat hasn’t done some great things, but I find it more confusing and less continuous). I was afraid the ep would be too ambitious and all energy would be put into understanding it rather than enjoying it, but I think it worked in the end. And whilst during the first watch I was dreading the end (what were they going to do with Gallifrey??) I was relieved by the actual finish. I was disappointed that Billie Piper wasn’t actually there to play Rose, and I did spot a few small plot-holes that I now can’t remember, but overall I’m pretty happy with how it turned out.
I don’t think I’ve had long enough to really build an opinion of the Christmas ep. Maybe I should do a reflective paragraph on it another post.
A recent bout of insomnia, other than spurring a tonne of fanfiction during the first night (I wish it could have been my coursework that got stuck in my head, but at least I wrote something) has made me read more, since I now stop looking at screens an hour before I try to sleep. This has meant a break from my Kindle, since it is Kindle Fire and more like a tablet than an e-reader. But it’s made me finally get around to reading some physical books again, specifically all 7 Harry Potter, which is and always will be my favourite book series.
I haven’t read them through for some time–the last time I read one, it was the seventh, and I finished the day I moved into my first uni digs (back in 2010). So it’s been a great experience re-reading them and reminding myself of all the greatest bits, especially those that never made it into the films, like my favourite quote:
It unscrews the other way”
or small details that I’d forgotten or even not noticed before, such as:
… one [task] that many of my followers would give their right hands to perform …”
(Both quotes by JK Rowling, I claim no ownership.)
Also moving through the series there were more of them, since the later ones I’ve read far fewer times. I can recite passages from the first book or two (I used to be able to do most of the first chapter) but the seventh I’m much less familiar with. Allow me to demonstrate.
All right, I’m a geek. And it’s all approximate, I’ve hardly kept track of how many times I read each book. The only one I can be certain of is Deathly Hallows, since I read it once when it came out, once to my dad, and just finished it again two days ago.
In my “calculations” I’m allowing for audio versions and the number of times I’ve read individual passages (for example some of the earlier books I flicked through so often there’s probably at least an extra read total in addition to having read cover to cover).
Joke of the Week
(Told to me at Christmas.)
It was a cold Christmas night. A man was sitting warm by his fire, when there was a knock on the door. When he opened it, there was nobody there.
“Excuse me,” said a tiny voice. He looked around, but still couldn’t see anyone. “Excuse me, I’m down here!”
He looked down, and there on his doorstep was a snail, shivering and dusted in snow. “P-please s-sir, I’m s-so cold, could I c-come in and shelter b-by your fire?”
The man picked up the snail, and hurled it down the garden, slammed the door and returned to his chair by the fire.
The next Christmas, there was a knock on the door. The man left his warm seat by the fire to open it, but again there was nobody there.
Then a tiny voice said, “What did you do that for?”
This entry was posted in Fan Fiction, Geekiness, Misc Rambles and tagged alexannah, Anniversary Celebrations, author, books, christmas, creative writing, doctor who, doctor who 50, doctor who anniversary, ebook, fan, fan fic, fan fiction, fan writing, fantasy, fiction, geek, genre, harry potter, jokes, kindle, literature, nerd, novel, novel series, prose, reader, reading, review, science fiction, script, series, sleepless night, tardis, time travel, wordsmith.
Thank you to MissTiffany for tagging me in the blog hop. I think I’ve figured out what I do now!
What is the (working) title of your book?
Conturbus Chronicles (1): Crossfire
Where did the idea come from for the book?
Good question. It was conceived about a week into NaNoWrimo 2011. I had almost given up participating that year, but then two plot twists came at me suddenly, which gave me a starting point and an end. The rest was pretty much improvised; I took a couple of days to brainstorm some characters, and the rest is history.
What genre does your book fall under?
YA urban fantasy adventure
Which actors and/or actresses would you choose to play your characters in the movie rendition?
I don’t know … I picture Justin as a bit like how Alex Pettyfer was in Stormbreaker, but he’s a bit older now! As for the others, I can’t think of anyone specific. I know I’d want to do as JK Rowling did, and insist on British actors, except the characters who are supposed to have an accent. I could live with Tam being played by an American since she has roots there, though I’d prefer a Brit.
What is the one sentence synopsis of your book?
Justin’s quest to find the Conturbus key before the evil Marotte takes him through a world of cape-wearing villains, dragons and vampires*, and magic that’s fully compatible with the latest smartphone.
*Not the sparkly kind!
Will your book be self-published or represented by an agency?
Too early to say. I read ebooks but I would want my book in print as well, and I can’t see that being financed myself.
How long did it take you to write the first draft of your manuscript?
If by first draft that includes the occasional scene in note form and great stretches lacking punctuation or speech tags … about three weeks. However re-reading it, about 60% needs cutting. At present I have a chapter plan, notes for future books in the series, a synopsis and the first chapter in full–so don’t hold your breath.
What other books would you compare this story to within your genre?
Hmm, tricky one. I did tackle this task as part of my writing course–my first chapter and synopsis formed part of my Fiction module–and found it difficult to find something quite in the same vein. The plot’s perhaps closest to the Percy Jackson series, but for older readers and without all the Greek gods.
Who or What inspired you to write this book?
I have to hand it to JK Rowling, if it weren’t for her I would not be a writer–or to be more precise, I would not be attempting it as a profession. And that’s nothing to do with fame and fortune, I mean her books inspired me, more than I can describe in a few sentences! I’ve been inspired by too many things (more than books) to name–television shows, photographs …
What else about your book might pique the reader’s interest?
Psychic scorpions, dragons who don’t look like dragons, a wizard hermit called Hobble, magic carpets and a smartphone app to help you find one … that enough to whet your appetite? And of course it wouldn’t be a London-based fantasy without something wacky happening on the Underground …
Now I pass this Blog Hop along to:
Thank you for reading! I’m sorry to say my novel will be some time in coming, but I’ve heard it said you can’t start talking about it too early …
This entry was posted in Uncategorized and tagged alex harlequin, alexannah, author, blogging, books, conturbus, creative writing, crossfire, ebook, family, fantasy, fiction, genre, harry potter, journalism, kindle, literature, nanowrimo, novel, prose, self publish, series, writer interview, writing, writing discussion, writing insight, young adult.
Not my most imaginative title, I know. Apologies for the delay in posting another … er, post. It’s that time of year when I eat, sleep and dream deadlines, and a cold threatening to cripple my ability to study has not been helping. So I decided to keep this a quick and easy one with little text.
I just completed a mock cover for my short story Unseen Injustice as part of my Genre coursework (left).
Criticism welcome, as long as it’s polite and constructive criticism. I did consider a career in graphic design, though instead chose to pursue a career in writing. But I don’t think I’m too bad at it.
I’m doing this post during a short break between collecting images for my Aquila cover. I’ll put that one up here too when I’ve done it.
This entry was posted in Misc Rambles, Writing News, Writing Process and tagged aquila, book cover, books, cfs, coursework, creative writing, fantasy, genre, graphic design, kindle, prose, science fiction, short story, superhero, unseen injustice, writing, writing student.